LoL, no, all the virus programmers get together in Vegas, in the guise of doctors, and behind closed doors, show off their accomplishments!
Most virus programmers are fight the man type people, who think they're winning by bringing corporations. Or similar.
I use the firewall from our ISP, and also use Ad-Aware and Spybot, both free for download, and very effective. I haven't had a virus problem on my puter in aages, and having said this, I will promptly be infected
The firewall we use is peer-less, try and see if your ISP offers one, we pay about $5 a month for ours.
As for the other, regular doses of ginger tea, with liberal infusions of chamomile, taken as needed. Works wonders!